November 8, 2014

Goodbye, Curly Fry. :(

Yesterday was Baby "B"'s last day with us. I can't tell you how strange it feels to type that. I have a million emotions about it, and I can't seem to put any of them down right now. I didn't cry. I felt nauseated all day, but I didn't cry. Which is really strange because, while I'm not normally much of a crier, I have cried every day since my sister died. Yesterday was the first day that I didn't. Maybe my tear ducts are just cried out for a little.

We would appreciate your prayers for him. His story isn't quite at an end yet, but we hope that he will find stability and security soon. I guess it's ok if I tell you all that the reason he couldn't stay was that he is native American and the tribe wants him with a family that is native. We wouldn't mind a few prayers for our family as well. Even with weeks of packing, goodbye parties at church, last dinners with friends, and photoshoots to remember him by, it still feels so sudden to have him just drive away and be gone. Paige was devastated after he left, and was sobbing in her room for quite a long time. It kills me to see her like that. After a while my husband tried to cheer everyone up by taking us to see a movie together, which turned out to be a great idea. (Big Hero 6 is great, btw!) We splurged on the big popcorn and a slurpee and Ace fell asleep on my chest, which is my favorite. It was pretty nice.

The strangest part so far has been seeing his empty crib in the morning and his empty space in the backseat of our car. I'll miss the games I used to play with him in the car when we took him to visits every week that would make him explode with that hilarious cackle-laugh that was exclusively his. :O)

I'm so sad that I'll never get to introduce you all to his cute little face! He really was an adorably sweet and lovable little pumpkin. We will miss him very much. But he will be in our prayers always.

Goodnight, loves. 
-Disney

21 comments:

  1. I'll be praying for you little Curly Fry!

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  2. Disney, I can imagine how much you must miss Curly Fry. I hope Paige feels better soon. I will keep your family and Curly Fry's family in my prayers. You have a heart of gold you know!

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  3. God bless your family and the work you are doing. I know Baby B's life is better because you were in it.

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    1. Thank you! We sure did learn some things while he was here. :o)

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  4. Praying. Sad that discrimination is alive and well. Some friends of ours were sued by a Native American tribe just before the finalization of their adoption of twin boys. The boys were 1/16 native american and the tribe was blocking their adoption based on race. The boys had been with their future adopted family as fosters for over a year and had already bonded. The adoptive mother dug through her family tree and discovered she had more Native American blood in her than the boys did. The tribe dropped their objections. It just seems so unAmerican that it even came up.

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    1. Thank you. I don't think they're intending to be discriminatory...I understand their reasons. It just stinks how important having the right paperwork is sometimes. And how hard it is to get it! But he will be safe and I'm glad of that. :o)

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  5. I am praying for you, your family, Curly Fry and for a change in the hearts of lawmakers in this state. Be strong, wonderful mama.

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  6. We're going through the same thing with two little ones we've been fostering for awhile. We were pretty certain that these little girls wouldn't be free to adopt, but you can't- and shouldn't- stop forming bonds and worrying over their uncertain future. They're slated to go back the day before Thanksgiving. It'll be rough.

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    1. Sarah, I'm sorry you're having to go through that. It is rough! Fostering is such a strange business, because you want them to be with their family...but you also don't want to see them go. But as long as I'm praying, I suppose I don't ever need to worry about how things turn out. God knows what He's doing.

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    2. my younger two children lived with foster parents in Korea before they were adopted by my Korean hubby and myself. I will never forget the gift they gave my children- the ability to bond with a family instead of them living that part of their life in an orphanage situation. There was no choice for our children until that time period - legal paperwork held up until they could be adopted. Your time with them was precious and priceless. As a person who has Native American in my background and having read so many books on the history of Native Americans, I can understand why the courts would want to keep them with a Native American family if possible. That doesn't make your family a undeserving family but rather you were able to support a child who had relatives that couldn't be there for the child in that time period of his life. Prayers as your family goes through this transition. Our children's foster parents were sad when they left their home to be in our home forever but when we met up with them a few years later, the hurt of losing a child they loved had healed. HUGS!

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    3. What a kind and generous thing to say. Your words have helped me see foster care in a way I was blind to.

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  7. You've done such a strong and amazing thing for that child, and that's a gift for him and for you. I don't want to sound political or discriminatory, but I feel like if there's an opportunity to preserve his cultural heritage in a way that provides a safe, loving environment, then it is right and beautiful to honor that. God bless you and all the wonderful ways your family is working in this world.

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    1. Thank you so much, Laura. I agree, I understand why the tribes want to keep their culture alive, and I'm glad they do. The timing is the only thing I don't quite understand, but that's ok. I don't have to understand everything. :O) I'm just glad he was with us for that year, we learned a lot from him!

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  8. You gave that little fry love when he needed it most. That alone will remain with him always.

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  9. Thank you for the love you shared with the little one. Because he has known love and security, he will have such a good start. May God comfort your family and Curly as you miss each other and adjust. xo

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  10. Aww, poor you and Paige! I work with children and when it's their last day at the setting my eyes are just bawling so I know what you're going through. I hope you get through it soon and that Curly Fry has a happy life x

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  11. This breaks my heart. It must be such a loving sacrifice to be a foster family. Thank you for being such loving and giving people!

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  12. I am so sorry for your loss. :( That must be INCREDIBLY painful. It must feel like a part of your heart left with him b/c you invested so much of your heart in him. :( Thank you for risking your heart to reach out to him to invest in him. :) God bless you for that. I really love your nickname for him too ("Curly Fry"); it is so cute and so affectionate. You can hear your heart for him, just in your name for him alone. God bless. :)

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